A Father's Day Tribute - In Rememberance of My Father

John and Margaret Morrison - My real parents

As we celebrate this year's Father's Day, I thought I'd share with my readers a tribute I wrote to honor my father at his funeral on behalf of the family on March 29, 2006.   I share with you the man who changed my life and today as a father myself to five children, I am just an imitator of this great man who I thank God everyday for having brought him into my life.  My mother still lives in Colorado Springs with my sister's family. The above photo was taken in July 2001 as we clelebrated their 50th Wedding Anniversary in Colorado Springs.

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Dear Mom, family members, members of the Village Seven Church, and friends.

My name is Steve Morrison, and I am the eldest son of John and Margaret Morrison.

In order to fully understand and comprehend the greatness of the man we are here to honor and bid fond farewell on his earthly life, and to celebrate the joyful beginning of a new life in the everlasting arms of God, it is important that I share with you the impact he has made in my life and in the lives of my family members.

Although my face doesn’t resemble any of my family members, today I declare to you, as I have before for many years, how proud and happy I am to bear the name of Morrison, and how privileged to have been chosen to be a son of John and Margaret Morrison. 

I was born in Korea, but lost my parents when I was a six years old lad, and grew up in an orphanage.  There I met James who was to become my brother later.  Mom and Dad had three of their own biological children named Rhonda, Cheryl, and Mark.  In 1968 they adopted James.

Shortly after adopting James, both Mom and Dad felt called by God to adopt another homeless child from Korea.  While browsing through a Holt’s bi-monthly newsletter, they came across a list of many children with pictures, in need of homes.  While Dad was reviewing the pictures and the descriptions, his eyes caught the picture of a 13 years-old boy in a Boy Scout uniform. Dad would later mention many times that as soon as he looked at my picture, he knew that the boy was his son. 

My mother wasn’t too thrilled at the idea of adopting a trouble-prone soon to be fourteen years old boy.  At which she pointed to another boy who was eight or nine, but my dad did not relent, “I have already made my decision.”   Mom pointed to another younger boy and said “What about this boy?”  To which my Dad would firmly say, “I have already decided. This is my boy.”  Mom was getting more and more worried about the whole idea, and decided to bring out James to the table to settle the question.  According to Mom, James looked at my picture and smiled and said, “He is a good boy, get him!”  That was how I got chosen that night.  That night I truly believe God spoke to my Dad, “John, here is your boy!  And I will bless you through him.” 

On May 28, 1970, I can still recall vividly the first day when I met my Dad at the S.F. Airport.  Because our home was in Salt Lake City, we took another flight to get home.  When I left Korea, I wore a brand new clothes and shoes.  When I got to the S.F. airport, there was a bundle of clothes from the Morrison family waiting for me. The first thing I had to do was to change my clothes and shoes at the airport. I guess it was a regulation at the time.  I was shocked to see that the blue jean had holes, and the shoes I put on were worn out and had holes in them.  When we landed at the Salt Lake City Airport, my dad took me to his car, and I was surprised to see a 1956 Chevy Bomber with rusted sides and torn up upholstery inside.  I looked at other cars and they were shiny and new.  By then I was beginning to feel uneasy about coming to America.  But then it wasn’t long before I realized that it wasn’t because my parents were poor, but it was because they were modest.  That was one of the first qualities in Dad that I saw.

I can also recall that same day Mom let me taste her version of Kimchi that is the most unique Kimchi that I’ve ever tasted (I later called it the Irish Kimchi). But that night as Dad tucked me to bed, I remember Dad gently kissing my forehead and saying good night.  For whatever the reason, after 36 years later, I can never forget that loving gesture.  That day, I knew I had finally found a Dad for my life, and a family of my own.

I enrolled into a Jr. High School and I began to sense a new found purpose and desire to study hard. While in Korea, I disliked studying because orphans are considered second class citizens, and marginalized by the culture. You heard nothing but discouraging remarks for being an orphan.  Consequently I did not do well at school because I had no hope.  But in the US, being in a new family, with a new hopes and dreams, things began to change for me, and I began push myself hard with studies, and had good results in school.

I remember watching Dad each day.  As he left each morning for work, he would always hug and kiss Mom and say, “Have a good day today, Honey” in front of us kids.  And at the end of the day when he returned, he would hug and kiss Mom again.  Not used to seeing that kind of affection in Korea before, at first I felt odd, but later I came to like what I saw.  Those images of my Dad being affectionate to my Mom have left a special impression in my heart that taught me that is how a man should love his wife. My mother taught me English and although I was a fourteen years old boy, she made me watch Mr. Rogers Good Neighborhood and Sesame Seed Street.  I remember the characters like Ernie and Bert, the Big Bird, and the Cookie Monster, and learned how to count backward.

I remember then how happy I was with the Morrison family. As a family, each day we would gather together at the dinner table, and each day we would take turns in saying grace before the meal.  My brothers and sisters got along harmoniously and I fondly remember playing hours and hours of card and board games with them. My mother made all the decisions at home and managed the house perfectly. And Dad was an avid reader who always had either newspapers or books in his hands. 

I also remember thinking at the time that this is what a happy family is all about.  And I began to dream.  I dreamed that someday when I grow up, I would become a noble gentleman just like my Dad was, and marry a woman as beautiful and wonderful as my Mom, and have children of my own.  That I would treat my wife just like the way my Dad treated, like a queen with utmost love and care and affection.  I also began to have another dream.  I began to realize that adoption was such a beautiful thing, and I realized what a blessing it was to have a family. It was then that I decided that when I grow up and have a family of my own, I would also adopt a child in need of a home.  In December 2000, my wife and I adopted our son Joseph from Korea. 

On the night when Joseph arrived, I tucked him to bed and prayed with him.  When he was ready to sleep, I bent over and kissed him on his forehead, just like my Dad had done 30 years earlier.  Only then, was I able to understand what he must have felt towards me. 

Today I am living the dream that I had as a teenager.  I can also say that this dream was inspired by watching my Dad. But I also admit that compared to my Dad, I am just an imitator of a truly great man that he was. 

In 1979, right after my graduation from a college, I had a month of rest before going into the world of my profession.  That one month of time with my Dad was one of the most significant moments in my life. At that time Dad was recovering from a heart bypass surgery.  One day as he and I got into a conversation on many topics, he looked at me and said, “Steve, when we adopted you, we adopted because you were in need of parents and a family. We adopted you because you needed our help.  But I now realize that after all these years, it is we who have been blessed much more through you.”  When Dad said those words to me, I was speechless.  I don’t remember if I uttered any words in response, but I felt a special bond of love he had for me. 

A couple of weeks later, my Dad and I got into another man-to-man conversation about life, God, marriage, and my future.  That day was to change my life in a very significant way.  As we talked, my Dad looked at me straight and made a statement so powerful that I will never forget it as long as I live.  He said, “Steve, I have made some very important decisions in my life.  The best decision I have ever made was to believe in God, the second best decision was to marry your mother, and the third best decision was to have you in our family.”  When I heard these words, I was just floored.  I could find no words to respond to his remark.  I just absorbed all the love that he was pouring out to me. I knew that Dad loved each of his five children equally, but through those words, he was telling me how much he loved me.  That day, my love and respect for Dad rose to a new height.  His statement would alter my life.  His statement has now become my statement and my vision as well. That is, to put God first in my life’s priority, then to love and cherish my beautiful wife, and to value and protect my children.

Dad was not only serious, but he had very humorous side as well.  He would often brag about how he whispered sweet nothing into my mother’s ear to win her heart.  He would often say with pride, “I turned on my Irish charm”.  He and I would even up to a few weeks ago would joke one another with “Sure and vigora”  I could never figure out what that meant.  He introduced me a term called “floakie” to mean some stuffs floating around on the surface of a cup of water or coffee.  He would often be heard of singing, “My Wild Irish Rose, the sweetest flower that grows…” 

There are several tricks I have learned from my Dad. My Dad always relished telling the story of how he met Mom.  After having seen her three times, while sitting on a porch with his wife to be, he said that he would predict the future for both of them.  My dad predicted that someday he would marry her and have a happy family in the Lord.  When I was dating a girl that I really liked, I told her that I will predict our future together.  I told her that we would be happily married and have a wonderful family in the Lord.  Well, the trick worked, and sitting here is my beautiful wife who fell for the trick.

Three weeks ago when I visited Dad at a hospital, I could sense that his life was coming to a close.  But during my visit, he kept his spirit up.  Obviously he was in a very good mood, and began to sing a song to Mom.  “Every day with Margaret is sweeter than the day before.  Every Day with Margaret, I love her more and more.”  As I listened to him sing, I felt lump in my throat and my eyes welled up with tears.  I thought in my heart, “This is my Dad.  What a blessed man I am to be his son. His love for Mom is so admirable.”  Knowing clearly where the song came from, I asked him, “Hey, isn’t that from a Hymn where it should be “Every Day with Jesus…” To which he whispered at me, “Shhh, don’t tell anyone about it.”  At this the three of us had a hearty laughter. 

In closing, I would like to say a special thanks to my Mom.  You have been a faithful help mate for 55 long years.  You have always been at his side, always respected and submitted to his leadership, and you have raised five of us children with utmost love and care, and emphasized the importance of having the right relationship with Christ.  You have gracefully aged and have stood by Dad to the end.  However, you still have a lot of works to do.  You are still needed by all of us, especially by your grand children.  We will do our best to fill the void left by Dad, and we will all cherish dearly the loving memories of Dad as long as we live.

And to my brothers and sisters, Rhonda, Cheryl, Mark, and James, let us do our best to imitate our father, and pass on the legacy of Dad to our children and to their children.

To Rhonda, Cheryl, and Mark, I want you to know how grateful I am that you have shared your Dad with me.  Thank you so much for being the best brother and sisters.  I also speak for James, as this sentiment is equally shared by him as well. 

And to Dad, you are the only father I had.  Your life is an example for all of us to follow.  The memories of your life will inspire all of us.  We celebrate now that you in the arms of God.  May you rest in peace.  You will be missed and we will always remember you.

Your Loving Son,

Steve Morrison

March 29, 2006

12th Annual MPAK Picnic - a Super Success

There were over 100 people.  The weather was perfect.  Even more perfect were the adoptive families and their children running around the park happy.  With a gigantic obstacle course moonbounce, lots of food and BBQ, the annual MPAK picnic was a smashing success.  There were so many new faces of parents, children, and friends.  There were a few couples that came to learn more about adoption, and went home convinced.  There were games for children, and lots of presents for children.  The picnic was held at the Laguna Niguel Regional Park, and the facility was beautiful.  For now I only have a group picture, but I will post the other pictures from the picnic later.  Thanks to all those that came, and special thanks to all those who served at the picnic. 

12th Annual MPAK Picnic at the Laguna Niguel Regional Park, May 21, 2011 (Steve in red on left)

To see the rest of the pictures from the MPAK picnic, please visit the Picasa link below:

https://picasaweb.google.com/116108980798237438960/MpakAnnualPicnic2011?authkey=Gv1sRgCKvHi9Cy1-uSaQ&feat=directlink



Current Status - A Nice Trip to Korea and Back, Well Almost.

I am currently writing this during my work related travel.  I have grounded myself at a hotel to sit down and finish off the letter to a Korean Government official regarding intercountry adoption.  The letter is too long I believe, but cannot cut out any portion of it.

I have come back from Korea, and what a trip it has been.  The National Adoption Day was attended by well over 1000 people, the next day MPAK had an adoption celebration in Kwachon City, the next day I traveled down to the city of Busan, where the city invited me to speak in front of their city workers.  I spoke for eighty minutes.  I had ten minutes left over for Q&A.  It was such an honor to speak to them my adoption experience, my values, and my work on behalf of homeless children.  Much like what I did at the Forum where I spoke on 'giving back'. On Sunday I gave a testimony at a medium sized church in Chungjoo.  Then I went back up to Seoul.

One of the open days, there was a meeting at the MPAK office with a Government official at the MOHW, representatives from all three big agencies, some came from KCARE, and of course me and Mrs. Han represented MPAK.  There were couple of professors of law that attended as well.  It was about running some public service announcement (PSA) using children's images to tug the hearts of Koreans to reach out and adopt the babies featured.  So the concern on the table was on commercialization of children, with potential implication that children's rights are abused by the PSA. 

Apparently there were some in Korea that were admantly opposed to it, and the MOHW wanted to bring all the concerned members of the adoption community and hear their opinions.  It didn't take long for all of us at the meeting to come to the conclusion that PSA would better serve children by finding homes for them.  This was going to be much like the "Wednesday's Child" program in the US where a homeless child or a sibling group of children are featured at many news stations across the country, and this method has been successful in finding many homes for needy children.

So the MOHW decided to run several children's PSA which is one minute long each.  MPAK worked with the adoption agencies and other organizations to produce the one minute PSA for 30 children, and 50 more were planned. But when the Minister of MOHW took this case to the Blue House and showed to other ministers what her plan was, there was no support for her plan from the other ministers, that argued about abusing the privacy rights of children.  So this PSA idea went nowhere.  It was a devastating blow for many children whose voices have been drowned out by ignorant leaders of the country, that probably have not even adopted one child.

What they haven't considered was that to put a child through an institution for eighteen years, ruin his/her life by not cultivating full capacity that a child could have (due to having no family), forced out of the orphanage when they turn 18 with a very little education and very little motivation, most of these children would struggle through their lives in Korea.  This is even much greater abuse to a child than a mere one minute PSA. What good is the privacy rights when the lives of children are ruined by blocking their rights to children? We are talking about one minute of PSA, which most people would not even remember of think about.  We only need one family for the child.  Compare this to the 18 years of delayed growth and suffering by a child who couldn't appear in that one minute, the only time a child might have a voice to say he/she is in need of a family.  Sigh.

From Seoul, Korea

I flew in last night and arrive in Seoul.
Every year about this time I make my trip to Korea.
The main objective is to participate in the National Adoption Day event, and this year marks 6th year since the National Adoption Day was established in Korea in 2005. 
The event draws around 1000 people from all over Korea, and it is sponsored by the Ministry of Health and Welfare (MOHW) of the Korean Government.  The event usually starts with an award ceremony recognizing all the individuals who have contributed much to the cause of adoption, and the second half of the program usually features adoption story and performances by well know artists.  Last year, the performance was given by a girl group called 2NE1, whom I didn't know anything about, but apparently popular even among the Korean-American teenagers in the US. 
After this event, I have to travel down to the Pusan City, where I have been invited by the city to come and speak to its city employees.  I don't have much information on what type of employees, or how many, but I am honored to be there to give a lecture to the city audience.
After that I will visit an orphanage in the Kimcheon city where they will have an adoption promotion event.  I have known this particular orphanage for many years and is one of my favorite place due to the warmth and care of the children by the orphanage director Mrs. Kim Jung Sook.
The next day I am scheduled to visit Chungjoo City where I am scheduled to speak at a church giving a testimony on Sunday.  After all the events and activities, I am to fly back to the States on Monday.
It is going to be a very busy schedule, and in between times I will try to visit MOHW and an adoption agency on a matter related to the issues of certain waiting children who have been already assigned families but have to wait for next year for visa clearance due to quota placed by MOHW on how many children can leave the country each year.
More to come later.

Mom, Do You Remember? - A Mother's Day Letter by Steve Morrison

With my mother Margaret

I wrote the following letter to my Mom in 2009 on Mother's Day.  The letter was published in a Christian magazine in Korea, and also translated in Korean as well. As we celebrate the Mother's Day, I thought I'd share with my readers the letter I wrote to my Mom and to remember the influence she had in my life. I hope you will all be blessed by my letter, and hope the letter will encourage all of us to relfect on our mothers as we celebrate Mother's Day this Sunday.

Steve Morrison

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Dear Mom,

It has been three years since Dad passed away.  How lonely you must have been during those years.  Whenever I think of you and Dad, the first thought that comes to my mind is that of yearning to see you both, and also a swelling heart of gratitude.

Kids are also full of praise for you, and constantly ask me when they could visit their Grandma in Colorado. Thankfully we plan to visit you this summer, and the kids are already excited and they are counting the days.

Mom, do you remember Dad’s funeral service three years ago? Remember that I gave a tribute in Dad’s memory? Do you remember me stating how proud I was to wear the name of Morrison, and how happy I was to be a part of the family? And I also said that being your son was such a great privilege as well.

Mom, do you remember?  I had a second birth in May 28, 1970 as the new 14 years old Morrison.  That was a special birthday for me.  That day as I arrived home, you came out to greet me as I was getting out of the car. I still remember your warm embrace and your loving welcome even to this day.  I still remember your warm smiles, but the best part was that you kept that warm smiles everyday. So whenever I think of you, I always have the image of you smiling at me.

Do you remember the day when I first arrived?  I cannot forget the Kimchi you made.  It was the most interesting Kimchi I have ever tasted.  You said that you had the opportunity to taste the Kimchi a few months before I came.  So you went to work to make me feel at home by making the Kimchi.  To be frank with you, I really had a hard time eating that Kimchi because it was very different.  Instead of using Chinese cabbage you used a regular cabbage, instead of putting garlic you put lots of onions.  You remembered that Kimchi being a bit sour, so you put some strong smelling salad vinegar (Kimchi is naturally sour when aging).  To make it spicy you sprinkled black peppers instead of chili peppers.   But the moment you opened the lid, I knew it was not the real Kimchi.  However, I was 14 and old enough to know and appreciate the fact that you were trying very hard to please me.   That experience has permanently imprinted in my heart your thoughtful and your warm hearted spirit. 

Because of your love, I had a new sense of purpose to work hard at school, and do my best.  While in Korea, I was treated like a second class citizen because of the “orphan” label that I carried with me, and heard a lot of discouraging remarks.  Thus I didn’t want to study, and consequently I wasn’t a good student in Korea.  In America, I had a new family, a new hope and a new dream for my future, and that helped me to do well at school.

Mom, do you remember the day when I brought home a straight-A report card?  You were so proud of me.  Dad was especially proud of me, and for each A he would give us one dollar.  Dad gave me $7 for seven A’s and he was very proud of me, while at the same time he felt his wallet becoming a lot lighter.  But he was still very happy about it.

I can never forget the way Dad loved you.  Every day as Dad left the house to go to work he would hug you and kiss you, and say “Have a good day, honey.”  And at the end of the day when Dad walked into the house he would hug you and kiss you and say, “How was your day, honey?” Dad was such a gentleman and I remember how I admired him.  The way Dad loved you has taught me that I should also love my wife the same way. 

Mom, do you remember teaching me English when I first came home?  I was 14 years old boy, and you made me to watch the Sesame Street and Mister Roger’s Good Neighborhood. I remember Ernie and Bert, the Big Bird, and the Cookie Monster.  Do you remember sitting down with me and teaching me everyday?  It was largely due to your help that I was able to communicate reasonably well only three months after my arrival.

Another fond memory I have as a family was the meal-time prayers.  We took turns in saying the grace.  We didn’t pray individually, but waited until everyone sat down to pray.  We lived as “A family that prays together stays together.”

Not a day goes by when I am not grateful for you.  It is because of you I have become what I am.  Especially I thank God everyday for having brought you into my life.  If God didn’t have a plan and grace for me, I would not be able to become a son of Morrison. 

It was largely due to your warm love that I have become a space systems engineer with a good job, a good family that is based on the unshakable foundation that Jesus has established.  I have a beautiful wife and four great kids.  Also, if it wasn’t for your love, I would not have adopted my son Joseph. I will love Joseph as you have loved me. However, I am only an imitator of your love and I don’t think I can ever love like you loved me.

You are the source of inspiration in my founding a nonprofit organization called Mission to Promote Adoption in Korea (MPAK) ten years ago.  MPAK has brought a positive change to the Korean adoption culture in Korea.  What I am most grateful is that through MPAK I have met so many wonderful families and exceeding joy as I have witnessed so many children finding homes because of my effort.  I fondly remember two years ago when I had the privilege to take you to the land of my birth and meet many MPAK families. They thoroughly enjoyed meeting you and the sharing you had with them.

For 54 long years you have stood by Dad being a true helpmate that God intended.  You have always respected him, and elevated him always, while at the same time acknowledging his headship in the family.  Out of love you submitted yourself to Dad.  You have also done your best to raise us five children, and your ultimate desire and emphasis has always been that we have the right relationship with the Lord.  For that I will always be grateful. 

Lastly Mom, your son Steve would like to express one more thoughts of love for you.  If God gave me another chance to start my life all over again, I would choose the same path.  I would choose the life of being homeless, go hungry, be cold, and become an orphan all over again and live in an orphanage. Why?  The answer is simple.  It is so that I could meet you and Dad again.  You mean that much to me.

Mom, be healthy and I hope you live forever.  I love you very much.  I can’t wait till summer to be with you again.

With lots of love,

Your son Steve

12th Annual MPAK Picnic

Dear MPAK Friends,

It's that time of the year, the 12th Annual MPAK Picnic.
I am happy to announce that this is a joint picnic for MPAK Families in Los Angeles, Valley Areas, Orange County, and San Diego Areas.  Non MPAK members and guests are certainly welcome.  Because this is a joint picnic with families from San Diego, we are meeting at half way at Laguna Niguel.
 
The picnic is as follows:
 
Date:  May 21, 2011 (Saturday)

Time: 11AM - 5PM

Place:  Laguna Niguel Regional Park, 28241 La Paz Road, Laguna Niguel, CA 92677
lagunaniguel@ocparks.com
Shelter:  Shelter #5

Food:  BBQ provided by MPAK.  I have listed some basic items needed for the picnic under "Please select something to bring" and you can check it off. All others please bring your favorite dish.

The picnic will feature:Great Foods
Giant Moonbounce with slide
Fun and Games
Lots of playgrounds
A lake in the park
Gifts for kids

Let's gather together under the May sky and enjoy a day of adoption.

Thanks and see you all at the picnic.

Steve Morrison
562-505-0695
mpakusa@gmail.com
Facebook:  http://www.facebook.com/mpakpage

Benjamin's Confession

Benjamin is doing very well with our family.
He has been enrolled into our medical insurance and his mother took him to the school to start the process of enrolling him.  He is full of smiles, and gets along with our four other kids. 

On past weekend we took the kids to Desert Hot Springs and the kids had a great time swimming and getting burned by the Sun.  It was super windy, but we had a lots of fun.

Last night we (all seven of us) sat down together for a dinner meal at our home.
Helen, our oldest daughter is also 14 years-old. So is Joseph whom we adopted 11 years ago is 14 as well.
So we have three teenagers at our home that are all 14 years-old and their birthdays are all within a month apart. I guess it will be quiet a challenge to send them to colleges all at the same time.

As we sat down to eat dinner, Helen prayed for the meal for all of us.
She thanked God for bringing Benjamin home.  She asked God's blessings on our home.
When I explained to Benjamin what Helen had prayed, he said,
"No one has ever prayed for me like that. It is the first time for me." Benjamin said this with a hint of gratitude.

The dinner time (or any meal time) with kids was loud and noisy with unceasing amount of conversations exchanged between the kids and the two parents.  As usual, the most loud and talkative of all was Joseph, and understandably Benjamin was the most quiet one.  With his limited understanding of English, he didn't know what was being discussed unless I periodically explained to him what was being said.  At one part of the conversation, the subject turned to school, as the kids were at the end of the spring break and the next day Monday was their back to school day.

At this point Benjamin spoke up with a Southern Korean accent (just like in the US, Southerners speak with accent). 
"Will I also be going to the school, too?"  he asked in Korean.
"Yes, your mother will try to enroll you into a school tomorrow."  I replied.
"Will I be safe at the school?  He asked that with a bit of worry on his face.  He continued,
"While I was in Korea I heard some stories where the kids in the US are very rough and tough and violent.  Is that true?"  Benjamin was concerned.
"It really depends on which neighborhood you are in.  There are some places that are dangerous, but our school is a very good school and you do not need to worry about that sort of things."  I tried to calm his fear.

"In Korea we have to 'school fight' a lot because there were fightings at our school all the time. What if I get into a fight?"
"Fighting is not an acceptable behavior at the school here in the US. If a person starts a fight, he will most likely get a suspension." I spoke this in Korean where the word 'suspension; is called '정학' (Junghak) in Korean.  Benjamin then asked,
"What is 정학 (suspension)?"
"It's a form of punishment where you may not be allowed to be in a class or from the school for a few days."
Benjamin mentioning the word 'school fights' brought me the old memories from my past where I have witnessed many fightings by individuals and by groups in the schools.

Benjamin then looked at me and wavered a bit as if he wanted to say something.
"How do typical Americans view Asians?"
"Well, based on my experience they view Asians as good people that are hardworking and tend to do well at schools and in business."  I continued,
"So that means Benjamin would have to work hard at school to keep up with that image, right?  I smiled at him as I jokingly told him this.

"Well, I wasn't a good student, and I have a confession to make." Said Benjamin.
"A confession?  What is it?"
"Well, um, ah,...well, ah..., I change my mind.  If I tell you this you will be in a great shock."
That got all of us interested in what he was thinking of.
"It's OK. Just go right ahead tell us.  Nothing will surprise us at all.  Go ahead, what's on your mind."
"Ah...well...no, I better not you will get too shocked at this."
By then all of the kids were interested in hearing what the secret was all about, and they all beckoned him to speak.
"Well, if you promise me that you will not get upset or be shocked then I might.  I'm not sure if I should tell it." He shook is head as he said this.
"Benjamin, it's OK. We won't think any less of you.  Go ahead."  I encouraged him again.
"Well, um,...at one time...ugh...well, one time I went to school carrying no text books and did not do any homeworks for a while.  This went on for a few weeks and I even slept during the classes."

We all looked at one another, and I blurted out,
"That's all?" I asked.  "You call that shocking?"
All of us expected something really bad, but not doing homeworks and not carrying the text books?  That wasn't what we expected to hear.  At this my wife spoke.
"In the US, kids usually keep their books at school lockers and you probably don't need to worry about that."

I confessed to Benjamin, "Your Dad did a lot worse things than that when he was an orphan kid in Korea."  At this my wife chimed in and said,
"Yeah, tell him about the story of how you broke the windows at a church for fun."
This was a news even for the rest of the kids that heard this fact for the first time.
They all beckoned me to share my story.
So I went on telling Benjamin and the kids some of the bad things that his Dad had done as an orphan.
One of my daughters asked me, "Why did you do it?"
"Well, because I was stupid at the time."
At this, they all erupted into laughter and the good dinner continued on.